With the holidays approaching, the New Year is right around the corner… which means so is the pressure of society-driven “resolutions” you’re supposed to make.
For those of you who are intimidated by resolutions, I suggest creating goals instead. Why wait until a certain time of the year when you can create a better you any time you please? Every day is a fresh start. And December could be a fresh start as well. Get started now and don’t wait until January.
I suggest starting a list or goals notebook to help you put your goals into practice:
Write down as many as you want. They can be small goals and don't have to be vague, i.e., walk on the treadmill for 30 minutes 3 times a day, eat clean once a week, read for 10 minutes before bed, etc. After you have set your goals, reread or rewrite them every morning and night in your notebook. Studies say it takes 21 days to set a habit, and if you continue that habit for another 90 days, it becomes part of your routine.
Please consider establishing emotional and physical triggers as well. It can be something as small as a picture or a positive affirmation. Example to put into question: what can you learn about yourself, and what triggers your bad habits? Also define what triggers your good habits or what type of reward you are seeking. When you eliminate a bad habit from life, it will need to be replaced with another habit, so why not make it a positive one? Positively reinforcing the good habit helps eliminate the bad one. Say you’re sitting at home, trying to lose weight, and you’re hungry. A good trigger - grab a protein bar (or a small piece of candy), drive to the gym or go outside and go for a light walk. That way, you’re getting out of the house and getting your mind off being hungry and keep in mind you’re working towards getting your body in shape. You will not see results overnight - these things take time. Another trigger - watch a show on the treadmill instead of laying in bed, or on the couch, watching TV. That way, you’re doing something healthy while enjoying a non-productive pleasure. Sometimes I have to tell myself that it’ll be over before I know it, and then I’m happy that I made the effort. Every little step counts in this long journey in life to be a “better self.”
If you feel like your goals are too daunting, you just need to get started with the one that is most important and start small. Will Smith said it best, “You don’t set out to build a wall. You don’t say, ‘I’m going to build the biggest, baddest, greatest wall that’s ever been built.’ You don’t start there. You say, ‘I’m going to lay this brick as perfectly as a brick can be laid.’” Example: If your main goal is weight loss, and your goal for the day is to get on the treadmill, just get yourself there. That’s all you have to do. You may stay longer than expected, and if not, at least you hit your goal. Again, this is about creating the habit of the new routine. And holding yourself accountable. If you have a hard time with that, grab a workout buddy or your spouse and work with them to make goals so you can keep each other accountable.
The big question: Where does that motivation lie? Your mind. You start overthinking and make excuses. “I don’t feel like getting on the treadmill today. So what? What’s one day? What if I skip today?” Once you’re in the mindset of not wanting to do something, your body will trick itself into thinking it physically can’t. Instead, you can shift your thinking and ask yourself, “What do I gain from not working at my goal? Will skipping one day help towards my goal?” You can also try using a mental trigger of counting down. Stop overthinking things and literally countdown 5-4-3-2-1, and just do it. If you give yourself a break from hesitating, it helps trigger action. Part of procrastination is building mental walls that keep getting taller and taller until we feel overwhelmed the longer we put something off. The more effort you put into tackling your goals, the easier it is to get over the wall. Check out the Ted Talk link below for more motivational information.
Keep in mind:
-Come at your goals with a sense of urgency. Tackle them instead of saying, “I should” do it. “I should get on the treadmill.” Say “I’m going to get on the treadmill” and do it.
-Use the holidays or a certain day of the month check-in to see if you're on track. Maybe every two weeks, check in to see if you’re hitting your marks, or perhaps check in at Valentine’s Day, July 4th, etc.
-Put your goals into practice with a positive mindset. Don’t forget to reflect and analyze and accept that failure is potentially part of the process and you may fall back into old habits. Don’t judge yourself - just become familiar with your actions. Mindfulness is the key to self-reflection. You can't change or improve something about yourself if you are unaware! It's about being honest with yourself and realizing that when you go against your goals, you’re only cheating yourself. If you need to set a new goal, don’t let it deter you. Just start again and enjoy the process. I like to say this is a lifestyle, and it’s not just a diet or a temporary hobby.
Lastly, the great thing about starting now is that once the New Year rolls around, you are already set in a routine. If you happen to get off track, you can hit the reset button and try again, or create a different approach and try again. At the end of the day, love yourself for who you are, and who you want to be. Self-love is what drives most goals. You have to love yourself enough to make those sacrifices.
Resources:
Here is a powerful, 20-minute Ted Talk about hesitating and decision-making: Mel Robbins’ 5 second rule to get you out of bed
Check out this article about productivity: What the Most Successful People Do Before Breakfast
Prefer reading a book? Check out: The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business
